Hey EA friends,
I just thought I would research the exact dates for each of your Betas this week so that I could pray specifically instead of generally. Here is the list in case it helps others to pray too! Please add to the list, if I have forgotten anyone. Thanks!
Britney - Tuesday, 9/27
Ashley - Wednesday, 9/29
Jennifer - Friday, 10/1
Lisa - Friday, 10/1
Em - Monday, 10/4
Praying, praying, praying for 100% positives!
Monday, September 27, 2010
In the Waiting
Funny thing about getting a positive pregnancy is that I thought the "waiting" would be over, but it really isn't. It is just the beginning in some ways. Once I found out that I was pregnant, I waited for the first beta number to ensure that it was looking good. After that number was great, I then began waiting to see if my second beta was going to look equally as good. Each step just brings me to another "waiting" period. Now I am waiting on the ultrasound to make sure our baby is still growing and has a heartbeat. I have seen so many other women's journeys through this process, that I know we are not out of the woods yet. Don't get me wrong - I am beyond belief THRILLED that we are pregnant and am celebrating what God has revealed to us thus far. I just know that my life and journey to adopt/have children has always been full of twists and turns. I never know just what God is up to.
In light of all of this, I thought I would answer another blogger friend's questions regarding the 2WW. I know many of you have already filled it out and I loved hearing your hearts and getting encouraged by the Scripture you were clinging onto during this time. So, here it goes...
1. What Scripture are you holding close to these days?
Luke 1:38 "'I am the Lord's servant,' Mary answered. 'May it be me as you have said'."
The reason I love this verse (it needs to be my life verse) is that I want to have Mary's attitude. This verse reminds me that I am here to carry out the Lord's purposes, not vice versa. It humbles me and challenges me to think eternally and not wordly.
2. What is your biggest challenge right now?
Not "feeling" pregnant some days and wondering if we will make it through the first trimester. All of this feels very surreal! I think that during my actual 2ww, my biggest challenge was obsessing about all of my symptoms and googling excessively. I went a little looney : )
3. What is DH like in the 2WW?
He was great during the 2ww. He was always positive and doting. However, at times he did seem a bit emotionally distant in regards to our transfer. When I shared that with him, he admitted to me that he didn't want to get emotionally attached to the idea because he was scared of being disappointed. (I share this with you with his permission!)
4. Now that you have gone through your FET, what one piece of advice can you share that you wish you knew/did?
I wish I knew about the alcohol wash in the middle of the transfer. Dr. K said, "This is the part you are going to hate me for." and I was thinking, "What? No one ever mentioned that there was anything painful during the transfer!" It would have been nice knowing what to expect.
I also wish that I had trusted God more, sat back and enjoyed the wonderful adventure, and googled less! : )
5. How can we pray for you specifically?
I would love prayers for God's peace to rule my heart and mind during this first trimester wait. (and beyond!) I sincerely desire to enjoy the ride that God has me on and enjoy every minute regardless of what happens. I would also love for you to pray that my life would emulate my Scripture verse above.
Our ultrasound will be in the next couple of weeks. We are a little set back in that our fertility clinic here won't do the ultrasound now that we are officially pregnant. They said that it is a liability issue since we aren't being seen by one of their doctors. So, the nurses are trying to figure out where to send me. I might be going to see my own OBGYN, but we aren't sure yet. I will keep you all posted!
I am so thrilled by our pregnancy and Krisa's! I am praying like crazy for the rest of you!!
In light of all of this, I thought I would answer another blogger friend's questions regarding the 2WW. I know many of you have already filled it out and I loved hearing your hearts and getting encouraged by the Scripture you were clinging onto during this time. So, here it goes...
1. What Scripture are you holding close to these days?
Luke 1:38 "'I am the Lord's servant,' Mary answered. 'May it be me as you have said'."
The reason I love this verse (it needs to be my life verse) is that I want to have Mary's attitude. This verse reminds me that I am here to carry out the Lord's purposes, not vice versa. It humbles me and challenges me to think eternally and not wordly.
2. What is your biggest challenge right now?
Not "feeling" pregnant some days and wondering if we will make it through the first trimester. All of this feels very surreal! I think that during my actual 2ww, my biggest challenge was obsessing about all of my symptoms and googling excessively. I went a little looney : )
3. What is DH like in the 2WW?
He was great during the 2ww. He was always positive and doting. However, at times he did seem a bit emotionally distant in regards to our transfer. When I shared that with him, he admitted to me that he didn't want to get emotionally attached to the idea because he was scared of being disappointed. (I share this with you with his permission!)
4. Now that you have gone through your FET, what one piece of advice can you share that you wish you knew/did?
I wish I knew about the alcohol wash in the middle of the transfer. Dr. K said, "This is the part you are going to hate me for." and I was thinking, "What? No one ever mentioned that there was anything painful during the transfer!" It would have been nice knowing what to expect.
I also wish that I had trusted God more, sat back and enjoyed the wonderful adventure, and googled less! : )
5. How can we pray for you specifically?
I would love prayers for God's peace to rule my heart and mind during this first trimester wait. (and beyond!) I sincerely desire to enjoy the ride that God has me on and enjoy every minute regardless of what happens. I would also love for you to pray that my life would emulate my Scripture verse above.
Our ultrasound will be in the next couple of weeks. We are a little set back in that our fertility clinic here won't do the ultrasound now that we are officially pregnant. They said that it is a liability issue since we aren't being seen by one of their doctors. So, the nurses are trying to figure out where to send me. I might be going to see my own OBGYN, but we aren't sure yet. I will keep you all posted!
I am so thrilled by our pregnancy and Krisa's! I am praying like crazy for the rest of you!!
2nd Beta Number is...
280! Yeah!! Next step - ultrasound. I will post more later when I have a bit more time, but wanted to share the good news. So grateful for this blessing!
Friday, September 24, 2010
And the Beta is...
... 88!!!!
Nurse Mary says that anything over 50 is a good number this early in the game. Yippee!! I, of course, didn't miss a beat with my obsessive test-taking either, so here is my darker line this morning. Can't wait to find out how Monday goes! Praying for all of your Betas coming in next week : )
Nurse Mary says that anything over 50 is a good number this early in the game. Yippee!! I, of course, didn't miss a beat with my obsessive test-taking either, so here is my darker line this morning. Can't wait to find out how Monday goes! Praying for all of your Betas coming in next week : )
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Still growing!
Just thought I'd share the updated picture from this morning. It was the first time the line showed up immediately! Yippee! Can't wait to get my beta number tomorrow. : )
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| I love seeing that line get darker! |
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Symptoms...
A few people have asked what my 2ww symptoms have been. Now, before I answer, I have to say that in researching other blogs and forums, it seems like many of my symptoms ended up in a pregnancy and some of them didn't. I really didn't know what to make of them because it appeared that everyone was different! I found myself obsessing about every symptom and wanting to lose myself in blogging/checking forums for some answer. It wasn't until Sunday that I was kneeling before the Lord and immediately upon doing so, felt convicted that I was trusting in symptoms, grading, you name it rather than in God Himself who is the giver and taker of life! I was sobbing because it was so vulnerable for me to go to and ask the Lord to bless us with a pregnancy, not knowing if He would respond as we would hope. So this was our conversation:
God: "Tracey, do you believe that I want to give you good gifts?"
Me: (in total tears) "Yes, Lord, I do ultimately believe that. I have no where else to turn."
God: "Then trust in ME."
Our path to building our family has been full of pain and disappointment, but I can honestly say that I have yet to be disappointed with God. His gifts are always good even when they don't feel like it! I would never have desired to have the adoption of Sadie's birth sibling fail, but God was right there with me, comforting and loving me through it. It is also what led us to embryo adoption. And being pregnant is a dream too good to be true!! It is so much more than I could ever have hoped or asked for. He is SO good and faithful. I was grateful for the Lord's reminder that my hope is in Him and not my circumstances. I know that even if this pregnancy ends up in a miscarriage, I can trust God who has the VERY best in store for us and loves us more than I can even fathom. I share all of this because I would imagine that we all struggle to some degree in this gray area of not knowing how God will answer. And for many of you who have been disappointed again and again, it is hard to be vulnerable knowing that it could again end up in heartache. I pray that our eyes will stay focused on Jesus and that His name would be glorified through our circles of influence as we trust Him with whatever outcomes we may experience. But, I still want all of us to be preggo!!! : ) : )
Now that I am done sharing what God has done through my symptoms, I can share what they actually are because I know that it is encouraging for others. Just remember that SO many people don't have any symptoms at all!
1. Major cramping on the day of and the day after the transfer. I believe that it was probably the little embryo warriors implanting!
2. Mild cramping on and off through the rest of this week.
3. Little twinges here and there.
4. A tad bit nauseous a couple of days.
5. A little bit of heartburn a couple of days.
6. I started having to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night every night on Sunday, which I never used to do.
A lot of symptoms! Kinda crazy! It does kinda help to feel like something good is going on down there, but while waiting I seriously wondered if I was just miscarrying or if it was the hormones. Really hard to tell with some of it.
I know that I don't really know each of my EA blogging friends, but I love you anyway! I am praying that each of you gets a positive test! It has been such a sweeter journey traveling with those who understand : )
God: "Tracey, do you believe that I want to give you good gifts?"
Me: (in total tears) "Yes, Lord, I do ultimately believe that. I have no where else to turn."
God: "Then trust in ME."
Our path to building our family has been full of pain and disappointment, but I can honestly say that I have yet to be disappointed with God. His gifts are always good even when they don't feel like it! I would never have desired to have the adoption of Sadie's birth sibling fail, but God was right there with me, comforting and loving me through it. It is also what led us to embryo adoption. And being pregnant is a dream too good to be true!! It is so much more than I could ever have hoped or asked for. He is SO good and faithful. I was grateful for the Lord's reminder that my hope is in Him and not my circumstances. I know that even if this pregnancy ends up in a miscarriage, I can trust God who has the VERY best in store for us and loves us more than I can even fathom. I share all of this because I would imagine that we all struggle to some degree in this gray area of not knowing how God will answer. And for many of you who have been disappointed again and again, it is hard to be vulnerable knowing that it could again end up in heartache. I pray that our eyes will stay focused on Jesus and that His name would be glorified through our circles of influence as we trust Him with whatever outcomes we may experience. But, I still want all of us to be preggo!!! : ) : )
Now that I am done sharing what God has done through my symptoms, I can share what they actually are because I know that it is encouraging for others. Just remember that SO many people don't have any symptoms at all!
1. Major cramping on the day of and the day after the transfer. I believe that it was probably the little embryo warriors implanting!
2. Mild cramping on and off through the rest of this week.
3. Little twinges here and there.
4. A tad bit nauseous a couple of days.
5. A little bit of heartburn a couple of days.
6. I started having to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night every night on Sunday, which I never used to do.
A lot of symptoms! Kinda crazy! It does kinda help to feel like something good is going on down there, but while waiting I seriously wondered if I was just miscarrying or if it was the hormones. Really hard to tell with some of it.
I know that I don't really know each of my EA blogging friends, but I love you anyway! I am praying that each of you gets a positive test! It has been such a sweeter journey traveling with those who understand : )
Well... I think...
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| The glorious beautiful faint pink line! : ) |
I am taking one every day until Friday to see that faint line get darker. Sure enough, this morning's didn't let me down. Grateful!
We know that we aren't out of the woods yet, but grateful and celebrating for today! Praying like crazy that we get an awesome Beta on Friday and that all of you reading (who are desiring and trying) get pregnant too!!!
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