Sadie's Birthparents

Our biggest news right now is that Sadie's birthparents are both in jail after being served their indictments for the adoption fraud.  We have been working with the commonwealth attorney to figure out what the plea bargain will be, if any, and working through Janie (the birthmom) being on home incarceration because (guess what?) she is pregnant AGAIN!  And not only is she pregnant, but 7 months pregnant!  She must have gotten pregnant 3 months after delivering the baby she didn't place with us.  I absolutely know that she was and/or is working with an agency to receive money again.  She must think this is her new career.  So, Jeff and I feel pretty confident that they need to serve some jail time.  Obviously, they have not learned their lesson yet.  It really breaks my heart.  She has also been calling us collect over the weekend.  We have not accepted those calls.  We believe that she is probably desperate and trying to offer us this new baby so that we will drop the charges against her.  We would be interested in adopting this new baby, but not at the price of dropping the charges.  We are not into baby selling or bribes!  The  sentence for their crime could be anywhere between 10-20 years.  Ouch.  We still haven't landed on what the offer will be.  The attorney really wants to take it to trial because he feels they will get the most jail time that way, but I am not feeling super comfortable with going to trial and testifying in front of them.  Mainly because we still have Sadie and need to explain all of this to her one day and we also don't want to burn bridges with them completely. We still have the slim hope that MAYBE one day they will reform.  I know it is doubtful, but with God all things are possible!  Love always hopes and as crazy as it sounds, I do still love Janie. It is definitely a love that come only from God.  Their pre-trial is on February 11th, so please pray that we have wisdom in all of the decisions we will need to make regarding their case.

On a more cheerful note, I am definitely enjoying feeling Keller kick like crazy.  Sometimes, it makes me well up out of gratitude to God for allowing me this gift of pregnancy.  We just went back to the OB to get some more pictures of Keller's heart this morning and it looks like everything is great.

We started our birthing classes this past Saturday and the first one went well.  Other than the video that we had to watch with, as Jeff says, too many naked women in it.  I think he is planning on opting out on the rest of those. Grateful that I have a man who only wants to see his wife naked! : )  I will have to say that it was a bit liberal with the nudity.  Not just for learning purposes.  Anyway, it was great to get some exercises to work on and relaxation techniques to practice.  Although, have I actually done any of these since Saturday?  No.  And, of course, I am supposed to practice every day.

I have been exercising fairly regularly though.  Woo hoo!  I do a lot of water aerobics at night and even tried a step class that about knocked me over.  It was probably a bit too much for me, being pregnant.  I was huffing and puffing and generally made somewhat a fool out of myself.  The instructor had everyone laying on their bellies at the end of the class to stretch our quads, so I had to modify a lot of various portions like that during the class and couldn't keep up with a lot of it.  I'm pretty athletic and have never had trouble keeping up before, so this was a new humbling experience for me. Especially since you still can't really tell that I am pregnant in most of my workout clothes.  I just look chunky! All worth it, of course!  : )

Here is one picture from this morning...

Thanks for reading and following!
Tracey

Feeling Baby Keller's Kicks!

Last Friday morning I was laying still in my bed before getting up and I began feeling some distinct "pops" in my uterus.  I wasn't completely sure that it was Keller, but I have been feeling those same "pops" pretty much every day since.  It definitely feels like bubbles popping in my belly.  So fun!  Of course, Jeff keeps putting his hand on my belly to see if he can feel them and I keep telling him that it probably won't be for another month or so before he can feel anything.  I think he feels a bit left out!  Interesting that Krisa had put in her blog that she read that the baby will come 147 days from when the mom feels the first movements.  That would put us exactly on my due date!  Fun to guess!

I signed up today for our water birthing class and intuitive birthing classes.  Our first private class is on January 30th.  The private classes are cheaper for us when we take childcare for our 2 year old into consideration.

We have been snowed in our homes here in Atlanta.  It is totally crazy.  Snow hardly ever sticks around for more than a day and I think we will have snow on the ground for almost a week!  Jeff has been at home yesterday and today and the verdict is still out for tomorrow.  I am going a bit stir crazy with having a 2 year old and no activities to take her to.  Even just errands or a lunch at Chick-fil-A would be great!  We did manage to get out this morning for a stroller ride (or should I say skate?).  Sadie was completely bundled up in a blanket so that her hands wouldn't get cold.  She refuses to wear mittens right now.

Yesterday Jeff took Sadie out for about 10 minutes before her hands got cold and later he finished the snow family they started on before Sadie had to come inside.  Here is the cute picture of our snow family.  Sadie is quick to say "Sadie - man!"  She knows she is supposed to be the short one. : )  For all who are also snowed in, I hope you are enjoying it!

The Big Ultrasound

We had our "big" ultrasound this morning that they do between 18 and 20 weeks and everything looks great!  Sweet baby Keller was measuring perfectly.  They weren't able to get a couple of shots of the heart due to positioning and age (I went in a bit early for the 20 week u/s), so we need to go back in 4 weeks to get those shots, but for everything they measured, she looks perfect!  Yay!

While we were having the ultrasound done, Jeff asked if they had 3D and they did, so we also got some great 3D shots.  They are so stinkin' cute!!  She looks like a real baby! : )


I don't think I am feeling the baby move yet, but it is so hard to tell what it is supposed to feel like!  Sometimes I think I feel something, but don't know if it is just my digestive system or something.  I definitely don't feel anything unless I am really still and concentrating on it, so I probably am not feeling the real "flutters" that are supposed to happen any day now.  Can't wait to feel them!  It will definitely make all of this seem more real.  It still feels surreal that I have an actual human being growing inside of me.  The whole process is such a miracle to me!  Very grateful that God is allowing me to experience it.

I go back to the maternal fetal specialist in a month for the additional heart pictures and then at 32 weeks I will begin seeing the specialist once a week for a biophysical profile ultrasound and my midwife once a week for a non-stress test.  They will space the appointments a few days apart to cover the whole week due to an increased risk of stillbirth because of my maternal age (over 40).  Glad to know I will be watched over and cared for so thoroughly!

That's it for now!  I will let you know when I start feeling sweet Keller's kicks!!

We Are Having a ...

GIRL!  Sadie is going to be a big sister!  We went into our "fun" ultrasound the Wednesday before Christmas thinking that maybe we were having a boy, but lo and behold, it is another girl!  Although having a boy would have been fun, I LOVE the idea of Sadie having a sister.  I have two older brothers and always thought it would have been great to have a sister too.

We are naming our little girl Keller Kathleen.  "Keller" was my grandmother's maiden name.  My grandma passed away a few years ago, but was one of my very favorite people in the world.  She was an amazing woman and grandma.  I loved her dearly.  "Kathleen" is my mom's name. She was so supportive of us when our last adoption failed and very instrumental to us moving in the direction of embryo adoption.  We wouldn't be pregnant today without her!

One issue with having another little girl is that our nursery is decorated for a boy!  Our last failed adoption was supposed to be a boy, so we had already set up the nursery.  My mom and I made the curtains ourselves and had the rocking chair recovered, so I really don't want to redo the whole thing.  I think I can transform it with a few minor touches, but it will take a little bit of work.  You can see the nursery in one of our previous posts here.  If you have any ideas, I'd love to hear them!  I am thinking of adding some fringe to the curtains and maybe some bird houses in the tree over the crib.  I will also add some bows and polka dots on the "Keller" letters.  At least the paint color is a neutral green!  I just wouldn't have gone with orange as the accent color.  Oh well.  

Hope you all had a wonderful Christmas!  We had a great time with my family and got to announce in person that we were having another girl.  Very fun!  Right now we are in the throws of potty training Sadie and I feel like I want to cry.  It is tough work doing the potty training in a day method.  I am exhausted!!

Love to you all,
Tracey

16 weeks this Friday

Merry Christmas everyone!  It has been so fun tracking with all of you through your journeys.  We have such an amazing God!  I love this time of year and I love it even more being pregnant! : )  Since I haven't posted in awhile, I will try to catch you up on current events....

After my last post with our progesterone dropping significantly, I returned to taking PIO shots once per day for a week and then had my levels taken again.  The level shot up from 17.1 to 87!  So, the NEDC nurse told me that I could stop the shots again.  They believe it was a lab mistake and didn't even make me get tested again after stopping the shots.  A little scary, but grateful that I didn't have to go in again for more labs.  And SO very happy to have GRADUATED!  Yay!

Our NT scan came back negative for chromosomal issues, but I still have to get my blood drawn one more time when I get my 20 week u/s done so that they can compare.  We don't feel it would be likely that this child would have any chromosomal issues only because the mother was only 19!  We mostly wanted to get the scan done because it was another opportunity to see our baby : )  Here is a picture of our little pumpkin (a little sideways - too tired to rotate, but you get the idea!)

We have an ultrasound that our midwife's practice calls the "fun ultrasound" where you can come in and find out the gender for $50 next Wednesday, the 22nd.  We normally would have just waited for our 20 week u/s, but my whole family is coming in for Christmas, so we thought it would be fun to tell them in person what we will be having.  My parents are coming in for the ultrasound too, so it should be an exciting day!  I am looking forward to it.

I am officially wearing maternity pants now.  I am VERY long waisted, so I am still not showing much, but I definitely have a big bump and the people who know me best can tell that something is sticking out! : )  My Gap maternity jeans are definitely one of my favorite pair of pants now.  Those and some wide-leg capri pants I wear to bed every night that were lent to me by a friend.  I think I will wear maternity pants after I am no longer pregnant.  ha!

I am definitely feeling a TON more energy now and I haven't had any nausea in weeks.  Very grateful!  I have been trying to exercise just about every morning as I have heard it helps in labor.  If labor is like a marathon, I definitely need some training!  We are planning on having a natural birth in water, so I know that I need to be in shape!  Or at least it will help.  We are meeting with a doula tomorrow night to hear about her services.  A couple of my friends have used this doula and love her.  They also had water births and assured me that I could do it naturally.  We will see!  Kinda scary!

Lastly, we got a bill a couple of weeks ago from the NEDC for storage fees for the remaining embryos that are siblings of our unborn baby.  My husband and I have had a hard time knowing what to do.  If we were younger, this would be a super easy decision, but I am 41 now and will be 42 when this baby is born.  So, we would be about 44 if we got pregnant and gave birth to an additional sibling.  We already have another child through domestic adoption, so we will have two when this baby is born.  But, we would love to have a sibling!  We talked with the embryologist today and I asked her if we would be able to "find" another couple of give the embryos to in case we decide not to use them.  She said that as long as the couple met their requirements and went through their process, that we would be able to do that.  Great news!  So, at least if we don't use the embryos ourselves, maybe we could find a couple that we could have a relationship with so that the siblings could know one another.  We have another year to make all these decisions and that makes it a bit easier.

Quite the Scare

After being off of all of my meds (the Estrace and PIO shots) for a week, I had labs drawn to make sure my levels were still good.  Well, the NEDC called me on Monday to tell me that my Progesterone level went from 57 down to 17.1.  They want the level above 40.  Not good.  So, they wanted me back on the shots and to go and get another ultrasound.  They were concerned that something happened to the baby, thus making my level go way down.  Fortunately, I had just had our 12 week screening ultrasound on the same day my levels were drawn and the baby was fine.  I told the nurse this info and she went and spoke with the doctor and then let me know that we didn't need another ultrasound then, but that we would get more labs in a week after starting the shots again.  After getting off of the phone with her, a bit of panic set in.  I still felt pretty certain that I was still pregnant, but I ended up calling my OB on Wednesday to see if they wanted me to come in with this new news.  I really hated worrying the whole holiday weekend about it.  As soon as I called my doctor, they wanted me to come in ASAP for a scan.  I was grateful for prompt attention, yet also nervous since they seemed to take it as somewhat of an emergency.  None the less, I went in immediately, my husband met me there in case it was bad news, and we got our second scan in less than a week.  And of course, our baby was alive and kickin' like crazy : )  Very, very grateful!!

All of this craziness definitely has made me more appreciative of the pregnancy (not that I wasn't already!) and also makes taking the shots not so difficult again.  Fortunately, I only have to take one shot a day instead of two as well.  They are thinking that I may be on them for another week or two tops.  Hope that's true!

On another note, I am now 13 weeks and my nausea has completely vanished and I feel like I am getting a second wind of energy.  Woo hoo!

Lastly, at our scan last Friday, we asked our tech to take a guess at what she thought the gender of the baby is and she thought it looked like a boy.  She said it was still 50/50 as she couldn't see the "full package", but thought it looked like a boy.  We would be thrilled either way, but since we have a girl, I know my hubby would love to have a boy.  Not to mention, our nursery is already set up for a boy since our last failed adoption was supposed to be Sadie's birth brother.  It would be great to not have to change it at all.

I hope you all have had a wonderful Thanksgiving, full of thankfulness for God's blessings.  We have a lot to be grateful for!

My Last PIO Shot!

I have really wanted to post a blog this past week, but keep finding that I have no energy to do much of anything, including blogging!  I faithfully read every one of your posts and am tracking with everyone's journey.  Sorry that I haven't been commenting much.  Please know that I am praying for you guys!

I was able to start weaning last Monday from the PIO shots and Estrace, which made me extremely happy. My rear-end has definitely taken a beating!  My husband was having a hard time finding a place to give me the shot due to bruising and lumps.  Going down to 1/2 cc instead of 1cc for every shot definitely helped.  I got my blood drawn again on Thursday to see if the baby's placenta was sufficiently taking over the hormone production and got the news yesterday that I could stop taking the PIO shots! I was so happy, I got teary-eyed!  Unfortunately, my Estradiol level did not come back with the lab report, so I am still taking the pills until I get clearance to stop on Monday.

I have had a lot of queasiness in the late afternoons and evenings, but last week was much better.  My main symptom right now is fatigue.  I literally take about a 1-2 hour nap while Sadie, my daughter, naps and have been falling back to sleep around 7-7:30pm!  I usually will wake up around 10 or 10:30pm and then go back to sleep for the night around 11pm.  It is completely crazy.  The hard thing about it is that I don't have the time or energy to be productive at the house or just spend time with my husband!  My house is a mess and I haven't ironed any clothes in weeks.  My poor hubby has picked up a TON of my slack.  I am VERY appreciative of how he has not complained at all.  I think he sees how physically miserable I have been.  I am definitely not complaining as we are so very grateful for the miracle that is producing all of these symptoms, but we will still be pretty darn happy when this trimester is over!

My belly is starting to protrude a tad bit.  It looks like I have just eaten one brownie too many : )  I can't wait to wear some maternity pants and have the extra room and elastic!  I go into our OBGYN next Friday to get the 12 week screening ultrasound.  We are looking forward to seeing our baby again!